We pull up to STK and valet my car. This swanky restaurant / bar has been featured on Entourage, so automatically you know it will be populated with store mannequins dressed in the latest fashions, staring blankly at each other with plastic smiles and hollow souls. We saddle up at the bar and settle in. Soon it’s time for us to enter the adjoining lounge to begin our speed-dating. The host is a lovely young British woman who hands us our “score-cards.” The score-card has a rating system numbered one through five: one being “I’d fancy a go!” and five being “Not in a million years.” Did I mention that SpeedLA Dating claims to be the “U.K. version?” No whistles or alarm clocks, just a British girl who gingerly taps you on the shoulder when it is time for us “blokes” to move on to the next “bird.” How “charming.”\r
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Eventually, I am directed to Girl Number One of approximately fifteen. To describe each girl in detail would be a futile exercise for me and my friend Jack Daniels. But I can say that a majority of these girls are either Asian or Hispanic, with a few Jewish and Caucasians thrown in for good measure. The age-range was specified by the service as being 24-36 (prime coupling years) and they all appear respectable and educated, if not entirely head-turning. I am surprised, however, to discover that a majority of these girls are native Angelinos. Never before in my eleven years in this city have I encountered so many genuine female locals as I have now, and I try to figure out some sort of pattern. In addition, nearly half of these girls are either lawyers or in the process of becoming lawyers—what does it all mean?\r
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I reach the end of the line and mark all dates as number fives, aka, “not in a million years”… except for Girl Ten. Call it a “lone impulse of spontaneity,” but if I had to choose any single girl from this bunch, it would have to be Sophie. Why the hell not? Let’s stay in the spirit of things. I hand my card in to one of the twins, efficiently weave my way to the bar and order another drink. \r
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The next evening I find myself neck-deep in this very article. I’m feeling inspired and confident…until now. I have no ending. No conclusive epilogue to wrap things up and make sense of being single in L.A. That is, until I receive an e-mail from an “Anoush Stevenson,” the owner of SpeedLA Dating. Her e-mail is as follows: \r
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Hi Marco,\r
I hope you had fun at STK last night and that Jade & Nikita took good care of you. I must say I found your Scorecard to be very sweet, as I know you brought Sophie along as your friend. She didn’t seem to be enthused about anyone at the event either, however I do not have a match for you. I am happy to help in anyway I can if you feel uncomfortable letting her know or asking her out on a date. If she is like me or most women, then she is probably completely oblivious to your affections. I am always available for advice. Let me know.\r
Best, Anoush\r
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Needless to say this was an unexpected, and amusing, turn of events considering I was not expecting any e-mails from the service. How this woman could read so much into a score-card is beyond me. Anoush’s caring seems to go above and beyond the typical business owner’s, even if the business happens to be love. Despite the possibility of making things awkward between my colleague and myself, I feel inclined—as a dutiful journalist—to include this development as a humble summation of the event. The irony that the owner of the dating service e-mailed me personally to offer her support in pursuing the girl I walked in with, is not lost on me. Irony truly makes the world go round. \r
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FORTH Magazine - 2010 - Written by: Marco Mannone
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