Like a lot of middle-aged women who have struggled for a lifetime to overcome emotional eating issues, obesity, and lack of regular exercise, I have often found myself in a bind: I've wanted to improve my strength and stamina, but felt too ashamed of my poor level of fitness and body image to sustain the effort at a regular gym where the ""fitness scene"" increased my sense of alienation. A local yoga instructor with deep respect for the body referred me to Conditioning Specialists where I have been working with personal trainer Viju Mathew twice a week for the past six months; I have recently signed up for another 36 sessions, which is a miracle for me . Each week I have had to face huge resistance to showing up and awkwardly moving through the workouts; half the time I feel like a retarded fool! It takes immense courage to choose a new identity, to imagine oneself physically fit, to fight the habitual, negative thoughts: ""Face it - it's just too late. Fitness is beyond your reach."" The truth is this: Viju and Doug and the Conditioning Specialists team are excellent trainers, role models, and skillful motivators
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