A quick disclaimer: This place gets five stars not because it itself is a five star establishment but because it is an oasis surrounded by places that you might actually give five stars, but would charge you $8.50 for a whiskey and coke. The place is also cash only but makes up for it by being very, very inexpensive compared to almost anywhere else on the west side.
The food is mediocre but reasonably priced. Their beer (other than their Russian Imperial Stout which is truly in a league of its own at something around 11-12% alc/vol and so tasty you won't notice that you just had three of them) is also mediocre but they have an excellent selection of guest taps from other local ale houses so just go for that instead. They also have a solid wine selection that is also reasonably priced. The bartender will generally sample anything they have to you before you buy, both the beer and wine if they aren't too busy.
Generally only one person working at a time means that you aren't going to have some cocktail waitress slavishly hovering over your table catering to your every whim. If that is your idea of good service there are literally hundreds of places nearby that would love to treat you like the amazing and beautiful person you are.
If, on the other hand, you are trying to get away from that aforementioned 'scene' that is downtown Portland then welcome home friend, it'll be good to see you in here!
Pros: Location, Cash-Money, Attitude, Hard-To-Find-Ness
Cons: Most of their home beer is sub-par, no liquor
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