I am the world's foremost authority on cole slaw. As such, I feel that it is my duty to protest the wildly inappropriate use of pineapple in coleslaw. Who do these people think they are? First, pineapple in slaw; then what's next? Anarchy in the streets? Public displays of affection? You people and your coleslaw get a room!\r
Sincerely,\r
Inez Velasco
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