Here is the big news. For the majority of women, following the initial hormonal surge of a new relationship, arousal precedes desire. What does this mean? It means that in order for most women to want to have sex, they have to feel physically turned-on prior to desiring sex. This is very different than for men. For men, who have about 20 times more testosterone (the sexual desire chemical) than women, desire and arousal occur almost simultaneously. They see or think about something sexual and they will likely desire sex. Arousal, given opportunity and barring complications, follows easily. Men think about and pursue sex to a far greater degree than women. Women are much less likely to be aroused by external stimuli. Desire and arousal for women is much more complicated.
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